Tag Archives: support

A Lick on my Shoulder

30 Oct

This is me trying to cope. My shrink says I need to accept the definition of who I am. Single-momming it, that’s what this blog is going to be about.

The five-month-old love of my life is sleeping in his crib and rather than catching up on my sleep I’m writing. For those who write, you may know the feeling – a sense of overwhelming emotions that seem to choke you up and can only be released by either writing, or sex. The latter I currently have no partner for. Thank god you don’t need a partner to write.

Everything I knew to be real, true, normal, life, for better or worse – sort of fell apart recently.  And now, here I am. Brand new life in my house. Everything I ever wanted, but not quite the way I planned it.

I get up every morning and hold him in my arms. He grabs my pajama top and tries to chew it. He stuffs his face in my shoulder and licks it. And that moment, every morning, it feels like when the battery on your laptop dies and you plug it in and charge it, and your computer sighs with a high pitched beep, signalling that it’s not going to die on you, it’s going to live.

So this is me, trying to live. Not just live, trying to be happy.

To quote The Little Engine that Could: I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.

 

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