Archive | September, 2014

Happy and Miserable (:(

28 Sep

This is me raising my head for a minute from the total mess my life is in to break the 5 week silence and say something.

At first I wasn’t writing because I wasn’t really sure how I could possibly say, here, to you, that BD and me were trying again, and that I was miserable again. I mean, really. It’s getting old. And embarrasing.

By the time I decided to write about it, my life had become such a crazy mess of back-to-school drama, that I really didn’t have time to put down even one word. Then the Boy was sick, and then I went to a friend’s romantic destination wedding with BD and had that to deal with, and then my car got hit by bus and needed fixing and then I was sick, and in between I was working on a presentation to the school board and to make a long story short, well, here I am. Happy and miserable all at the same time.

Here’s a game my Boy and I have started playing recently. It’s called the Thank You Game. I love doing this with him. We each in turn have to say something we’re thankful for. I’ll say: I’m thankful to have such a delicious dinner on my plate. He’ll squeal happily: Mmmmm! Delicious! And add: I’m thankful for my choo choo train. And I’ll say: I’m thankful for our friendly neighbors. It’s so nice to have good neighbors. And he’ll say: I’m thankful for the cats! Meaning the ones that run around in the yard, that he greets with an excited “Hello cat! How are you?” every afternoon when we come home from daycare. He must be the sweetest almost two-and-a-half year old on the planet. I’m so lucky to have him in my life.

So I’m happy. Despite the exhaustion, I do like my hectic life and the feeling that everything is constantly moving. But I’m also miserable. Because, well, you know. I’m not going to get into it again.