CTRL-ALT-DEL

20 Nov

Wanted: A hot guy who likes slightly overly curvy single moms, sensitive, happy and good in bed, ready to infect me with his happiness for one night only. Any takers?

I had a long talk with a friend tonight about body image. I remember a time when I was in high school and hated my body with every fiber of my being. I thought I was fat, ugly, I hated my smile, I used to cover my face with my hand to hide it and smile with my mouth closed because my teeth aren’t perfect. And I was so young, and so beautiful, I can’t believe I didn’t appreciate it, forget appreciate – I can’t believe I didn’t CELEBRATE it.

So my friend thinks I shouldn’t repeat the same mistake again, and let this precious time, my youthful 30’s go to waste without celebrating my lushness and abundance.

The only thing is, I have to let go of all my inhibitions first. I have to know that I am beautiful, that I deserve to be happy, that I am worthy of warmth and tenderness. I have to stop being such a bitch to myself, putting myself down and slapping myself around (We have a bit of an abusive relationship, myself and I).

I have another friend, who claims that a step towards getting what you want in life is being able to express it, to say what you want – to “summon” it. So this is me summoning wamrth, summoning closeness, summoning a big CTRL-ALT-DEL to all my inhibitions, followed by a new beginning.

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